The Dog Ate My Homework

Excuses. We used them in school. We use them now. Some are legit. Some … well, not so much:

• I’ve been sick in bed – when I wasn’t in the bathroom – for the whole last week.
• I’ve been meaning to do it, really I have, but a baseball hit me in the head and caused amnesia.
• I just haven’t had time, what with searching the entire city for my runaway pregnant guinea pig.
• A tornado swooped down out of nowhere and ripped my completed manuscript right out of my hands.
• The dog ate my homework. And then puked it up all over my bed.  Do you still want it?

But I do believe I heard the gold medal winner last week. Legit or not, it made me laugh. I mean a big ole belly laugh here.

It started on Dec 1 when my newest “Baby Blessing” (that’s what I affectionately call the offspring of my original Too Blessed to be Stressed book) was due to release.  This one is called Too Blessed to be Stressed: 3-Minute Devotions Journal for Women. (It’s a beautiful,  7″ x 9″ hardbound devo with larger font, plenty of room to journal and a pretty elastic page marker).

So I eagerly watched my front door for delivery men that day, waiting for my author copies to be delivered. Nothing.

The next day, same. Nada.

The following day, then the next, and the next. Zip.

Finally, realizing that I must’ve gotten the release date wrong (they’d never no-showed a book before), I emailed my publishing house editor to inquire about the status of the books.

Well … er … um … she sheepishly hemie-hawed a bit before admitting, that, yes, the release date was supposed to be Dec 1, but …

But what? 

But something unforeseen happened.

Like what kind of something unforeseen? 

(Now this is where it gets good.)

Unfortunately, she admitted ruefully, the ship carrying the container with your books in it was in a bad storm at sea. The shipping container got knocked over by the huge waves rocking the ship so they had to dock the boat and rescue the books, which were inspected and removed safely from the boat, then rerouted over land to our warehouse in Ohio. [I pictured her taking a big breath here.]  But …

Yes? But what?

They sorta went the long way around the country by mistake. They were in Arizona yesterday. They should be here sometime next week. (I was sure hoping she wouldn’t add, “if they can find them.”)

The good news is that this little fiasco inspired a possible new book title: My Shipwrecked Blessings. Whadaya think?

So you see?  I have no reason to disbelieve my editor, but hey, if you have to have an excuse for something, make sure it’s got flair!

 

And you, my friend? What’s the best excuse – legit or not – you’ve ever heard?

P.S. New giveaways featuring this very Devo Journal and some other great decom-stressing stuff are coming up SOON on my free e-newsletter, so if you’re not already subscribed, be sure to!